February 28, 2011

One year ago today I had one of the worst experiences of my life. When it happened, I didn't tell very many people about it but a year later, I really want to think back on it and be very happy that everything turned out okay in the end.

It was a teaching day. I had my morning composition class and then a break before my afternoon literature class and a comp class right after it. Things were going fine. I was about 11 weeks along in my pregnancy and not showing at all yet and hadn't really even told many people that I was pregnant yet.

When I walked into my literature class, I noticed that our small class was very small that day. I don't remember exactly how many students were there but it was at least half empty. We were discussing the Aeneid and it was just not going well. I don't know why, but those students who were there just weren't really into that day's reading (or perhaps hadn't done the reading) so it was tough get a discussion going that day. I almost called it quits halfway through class, but I kept going. About 5-10 minutes before the end of class, I felt (and this is where it might get TMI for some, so I apologize and you might want to skip ahead a few paragraphs) some wetness in my pants. I usually didn't have time to go to the bathroom between the two classes, but I went ahead and made a beeline straight to the bathroom as soon as I dismissed the class (thankfully, the students seemed to want to get out of there that day, too, and no one stayed around to chat after class).

When I got to the bathroom, I discovered that I had started bleeding. And I don't mean just a little blood, I mean a LOT of blood. The usual standard is that it is abnormal if you fill a pad within an hour. I think I would have filled one in less than half that time. I panicked a little. I was supposed to go teach another class right then. But I obviously needed to go to the doctor right away. Had the blood seeped through my pants? Could I even walk down the hall and get out to my car without everyone noticing? How should I let my class know that I needed to cancel? I think I was thinking about all of those thoughts because I was trying not to let the one thought that was most important enter my brain: was I having a miscarriage? Even now as I type this, knowing the happy outcome, I'm getting a little choked up.

I knew that I couldn't just stay in the bathroom. So I stuffed a bunch of toilet paper in my pants and walked to the liberal arts office. My class was upstairs and I didn't want to go up the stairs to go tell them personally that I had to cancel class. So I just asked one of the office assistants if she could please go up to my class and let them know that it was canceled because I had an emergency. I then went to my office to get my stuff and my office mate was there. I told her what was happening. I then walked out to my car, dialing Jarrett on my phone on the way. I think that I almost walked out in front of a car because I was so distracted. I'm sure the driver probably thought that I was just another stupid person who couldn't pay attention to where she was going because she was talking on her cell phone. I told J that I was going to go to the emergency room.

The good thing is that the hospital was actually just a few blocks away from the school so I decided to just drive myself there rather than waiting for J or calling an ambulance. But the bad thing was that the timing was right between classes so the campus was congested and I felt like it was an hour before I actually made it off the tiny campus to the street (it was probably a good 10 minutes when it should have been less than one minute).

I had never been to that hospital before--heck to be honest, I'd never been to an emergency room at any hospital before--so I followed the signs to the emergency room. When I walked in the doors, I wondered if I had the right place. I know it's not a huge hospital, but where was the bustle and all of the emergencies going on? I guess I've seen too many hospital shows on TV. It was actually a couple of minutes before someone even bothered to ask me if I needed help, as I looked around wondering where I was supposed to go. But once I explained what was happened, I got whisked off to an exam room right away.

I don't know how long it took before I was examined. I had to change out of my clothing and into a gown. When I pulled the toilet paper out, I had bled quite a bit more. My heart was racing. I wondered how long it would take Jarrett to get there. One of the first things the nurse did was check for the baby's heartbeat. I can't tell you how it felt the moment when I heard that heartbeat. It was the most wonderful sound in the world. (Again, I am getting a bit choked up now thinking about it.) Jarrett actually walked into the room about a minute later and as soon as I saw him I remember the words "There's a heartbeat" bursting out of my mouth.

We were at the hospital for several hours. I got an internal ultrasound where we saw that everything was looking good. And it was wonderful to see the image on the ultrasound, but it was hearing that heartbeat that still made me feel so much better. They had no idea why I had started bleeding (and we never did figure it out), but everything looked okay. So I was eventually discharged and told to go on pelvic rest (rather than full bed rest) until cleared by my OB.

So while I was home I made sure to sit down a lot. I didn't carry anything heavy (I wasn't supposed to lift anything over 10 pounds), so no laundry without a lot of help from Jarrett. I went back to teaching, but I took the elevator to the second floor instead of walking up the stairs, carried only the essentials to class, and sat down while teaching instead of standing or walking. And because the sitting down was so different from what I normally did in the classroom, I did end up telling my students that I was pregnant but there were some complications and I needed to take it easy for a while.

One thing that I did learn from the experience was how much the standing/walking around the room was a major part of my teaching persona. Just sitting there and not being able to move felt so foreign to me. I really hated having to teach that way, but it was worth it to make sure that everything was okay with the baby.

I did continue to bleed for a while, but never in the amount that I had bled at first. I lived in constant worry for those few weeks, waiting for each doctor's appointment in agony until I could hear that heartbeat and know that the baby was okay.

Today as I look at Luke, I remember what happened a year ago. I am so thankful that I was not having a miscarriage and that all was okay in the end. I couldn't imagine not having Luke's smiling face to look at each day. I do still wonder what could have caused the bleeding, especially in such a large amount, but I don't think we'll ever know. But now that I have relived this experience by writing it all out, I think I can really just let it go. What happened a year ago is no longer important. What is important is what is happening on February 28, 2012: Luke smiling and playing and even getting grumpy when his mouth hurts from teething. As soon as I finish typing this and hit Publish, I'm going to leave this date in 2011 behind and just focus on 2012. So I'm not even going to reread this post and edit/proofread like I usually do. It's done. And Luke is awake and happy so I'm going to go play with my son.

This Week's Food: Pear

So last week was sweet potato. We had highs and lows. One day (I think it was Friday), he ate a whole serving (about a tablespoon) of sweet potato without too much trouble. One day or two he was cranky and so I didn't even try feeding him solids and the other days he wasn't too interested in eating. He didn't seem to hate the sweet potatoes, but he didn't really seem to want to eat them either and he only ate a little bit.

So this week we're trying pear. I tried only a tiny amount today and he seemed indifferent toward it. He didn't make a face or spit it out, but he rolled it around in his mouth for a long time. I'm not sure if he was tasting it or if he didn't really know what to do with it or what. But we'll keep practicing.

To make the pear, I needed to steam it. Now, we do have a steaming basket and I have used it before (like once or twice), but I have to admit that the thought of using it wasn't fun. I completely admit it. I'm quite lazy about food. Sometimes I do get excited about a recipe and I get in the kitchen and make it, but mostly, I have plenty of things I'd rather be doing than cooking. And I know it's not like steaming fruits and veggies is really all that hard or time consuming, but I know it's something that I would do begrudgingly. So I was curious when I went to Target today to see if there were other options for steaming. And there was.

I've heard of the Baby Bullet for pureeing foods, but didn't really look into it because we have a food processor and so didn't need something else to puree. Well, apparently there is also a Baby Bullet Steamer. I decided to give it a try. I also picked up some pears, avocados, zucchini, and squash to go ahead and make up and freeze for future meals for Luke.

While reading the instructions for the steamer, I noticed that it had a special tray to make hard boiled eggs. Hmmm...I like hard boiled eggs (and deviled eggs), but I really hate actually making them. I never quite get it right. So since we have a good number of eggs in the fridge right now, I decided to make four (the steamer can make up to six). I filled the tray with the specified amount of water, put on the egg tray and the four eggs, and set it to the right number. About 15 minutes later (I don't remember for sure as I didn't look at the clock), the buzzer went off and my eggs were supposedly done. I dunked them in a cold water bath and then put them in the fridge.

I went on to make Luke's pears. The only bad thing is that I had three pears and the steamer really only holds one pear at a time (cut into chunks). Of course, our steamer basket is small, so it probably would do only one at a time as well. The pears took 13 minutes for each one and it seems to have steamed them nicely. I put the pears in the food processor and pureed them. Then I filled an ice cube tray and put it in the freezer. When the cubes are frozen enough, I'll put them in a zip lock bag for easy storage. I decided to do the other foods a little later.

I remembered my eggs in the fridge and decided to give one a try. I cracked the shell and found that it peeled off very nicely (something that rarely happens for me--although that may have had to do with the time they spent in the fridge which is a step I've never tried before). I bit into the egg carefully, expecting the yolk to be underdone (which I hate). To my surprise, I found that it was cooked rather perfectly. Woo hoo! I think I've found an easy way to make a healthy snack. Make up a half dozen of the eggs, put them in the fridge, and when I want a snack, reach for an egg rather than some chips.

But back to Luke. Since he only had a little pear, I decided to also give him a bit of banana (still trying to see if he'll like it a little better). I had one banana left on the counter and I could tell that it was going to go bad pretty soon. While at Target I had also picked up some mesh feeders. I decided to put the banana in it and let Luke feed himself to see how that worked. Here's how it went:

Hey Mommy, why do you have your camera out? There must be something important about to happen.

Oh look, something for me to put in my mouth.

Wait a minute, this tastes a little funny.

Hold it right there! There's a banana on that plate! Is there a banana in this thing I was chewing on??

Okay, Mommy, I'll try one more time.

Still tastes like banana.

Can we please just be done with this whole banana thing?

So, he didn't seem too impressed with either the mesh feeder or the banana. I'm not going to give up though because bananas are yummy and I'm sure he'll like them at some point. Once I get a few more single ingredient foods tried out on him, I'm going to start mixing some together, so it'll be interesting to see if he'll be more interested in eating banana if it is mixed with something else he does like.

In other Luke news, he has had some moments of better sleep the past two nights (meaning one longish stretch), which is encouraging. But he's also been more cranky during the day.

Thursday was his doctor's appointment and he got a lot of shots. Thursday evening, he had a slight fever. On Friday morning we were going to try to go to a play group, but his nap time started a little later than usual and he slept for a good chunk so we didn't make it to the play group. Two of the other moms had the same issue, so the three of us actually got together for our own small little play group once our three kids woke up. And Luke had several moments where he just burst into tears. He would be perfectly fine and then, boom! Huge crying. I had a little foam letter packed in the diaper bag and gave him that to chew on and that seemed to make him happier. After a little while I decided to take him home and see if he needed another nap. (And sure enough, when we got home, I nursed him and he fell back asleep.)

I had noticed that he still had a slight fever (99.5). I couldn't remember how long he might have a fever from the shots, so I called the doctor's office and was told he could actually have a fever, and much higher than what it was, for up to 72 hours. I was glad later that I made that call then because in the early evening I took his temperature and it was up to 101. Eek! I gave him some Tylenol and that seemed to help. But he was not really fully acting like his usual cheerful self. It also seemed like he had forgotten that he could roll over. 

I was expecting a long night full of soothing. It started out with him waking up about every 1.5 hours, but then he slept from 1:30-5:30 straight. This morning, his fever was gone (yay!) and he seemed much more cheerful. He went right back to rolling over multiple times whenever I put him on his back and seemed happy to play with his toys. We went out after his morning nap to look in on a friend's cats and also to make the Target run. I realized that I was low on gas (my car estimated I could go 40 more miles), so I decided to go to a gas station first. One the way there, Luke started crying. He calmed down a little as long as I was singing "The Itsy Bitsy Spider." I got gas, made sure he had his pacifier handy, and then drove on to Target.

Cue the crying. Cue the screaming. Why does it have to happen when I'm driving and can't do anything about it? Even the singing didn't work this time. I went ahead and stopped at Target and parked and got into the backseat, took him out of the car seat, and just held him, which calmed him down. I then grabbed a cart and put the cart cover we bought recently but hadn't yet used on it and strapped Luke in (I thought that he might like riding in the cart that way instead of strapped to me in the Ergo because then he could look around a bit more). And it worked. He only started to cry a little bit one time in the store and he was easily calmed. So I got through shopping and headed home. More crying. Nap time.

He slept for a good chunk and when he woke up we did the above feeding. Then we got down on the floor to play and he was cheerful for a little while. Then he started to get a little upset again and I handed him a nearby toy--Sophie (a little teething giraffe). Oh my gosh. If Sophie had been something to eat, Luke would have gobbled her up instantly. He was just chomping on her and rubbing her on his gums for a good while. So I'm thinking that the recent crying fits may be teething related. I noticed while in Target that he was running his tongue around in his mouth, which is something I hadn't really seem him do before.

I finally got him settled down for his third nap of the day (and unfortunately missed out on a dinner invitation from some friends who were in town) and he's been asleep for almost an hour. But he just woke up and he's already crying again, so I'd better end this and go see what's bothering him now. Hopefully Sophie can make him feel better.

Six Months Old Today

My little boy is 6 months old today. So exciting to see how he is growing and developing.

He had his doctor's appointment today and got quite a few shots (vaccines as well as the flu shot). He cried for a little while, but settled down fairly quickly and fell asleep in the car on the way home. When we got home, he was all smiles, nursed, and eventually fell back asleep (he's sleeping now as I'm typing this). I'm prepared for an afternoon/evening of extreme fussiness, but I'm hoping the smiles mean that he'll be fine today.

He checked out just fine and is continuing to grow nicely. His weight for his height did go down a little in the percentage, but since his daddy was long and skinny, it's likely Luke will be the same way and the doctor wasn't concerned. So here's his progress since his 4-month appointment:

Height at 4 months: 24"

Height at 6 months: 26"

Weight at 4 months: 13 lb 4.9 oz

Weight at 6 months: 15 lb 9.9 oz

The doctor did ask about feeding solids and said he should be eating 3 meals a day. I told her that just this week we've tried sweet potato and banana but it appears that he still has the tongue thrust reflex as he keep just pushing the food back out, so I'll keep trying but I'm not going to force food on him. She recommended rice cereal because it is iron fortified. I just smiled and nodded. I'd prefer that Luke eat real foods and get his iron from iron-rich foods rather than rice cereal (although I will try oatmeal at some point). I'm also not going to give him three meals a day for a while. We're just going to do once a day until he actually starts eating instead of thrusting the food out, then move to twice a day and then finally three times a day. I want to introduce food more gradually (and since he's still breastfeeding, he's getting the nutrition he needs from that). [Note: I've been doing lots of research on feeding solids, so I'm not just ignoring what the doctor said because I feel like it.]

Here are some pictures I took of him this morning:

Here are his previous monthly pictures, so you can really see how much he's grown!

August 23 - birth

September 23 - 1 month

October 23 - 2 months

November 23 - 3 months

December 23 - 4 months

January 23 - 5 months

The sad part of growing (besides the fact that he's not going to be a baby too much longer!) is growing out of clothing. There were some outfits that he had in 3-6 months size that I just loved. And I think that I kept telling myself that they were still fitting just fine long after he really should have moved up in size because I didn't want to have to have him stop wearing those outfits. But he's truly up to the next size (which resulted in a quick shopping trip to get him stuff that fit!), so I have to say goodbye to the following outfits. At least I have pictures and memories.

Superman!

I'm Batman!

Love the little monster playing a guitar

Dinosaurs!

He looks so grown up in this outfit!

Dinosaur playing a guitar!

I'm not super fond of most of the clothing he has in the 6-9 month size, but in some ways that's probably good so that I won't get sad again when he outgrows it as I'm sure he'll do and probably long before he reaches 9 months.

The other exciting part of him getting older is all the stuff he's doing now and how much more interested in various toys he has become. When we were at our moms' group this week, I stood him up at the activity table that the hosting mom had and he seemed to really enjoy it, so I stopped by Toys R Us and picked up one (I thought that I had a 20% off coupon, which is why I bought one new instead of used, but it turns out that the 20% off coupon for Toys R Us is not actually good on toys *sigh*). I do have to be right with him when he's using it (although he is able to hold himself up by holding onto the table), and he seems to like it so far. But in looking for the table, I went out of the baby section of the store and into the larger section. And my gods, there are so many awesome toys. I don't want him to have a ton of toys, but it's going to be hard not to do that as some of the stuff just looks so neat. I'm looking forward to seeing him play and seeing how his play time develops over the next 6 months.

As for sleep, he's still waking up pretty often at night (see previous post about sleeping) and needs me to nurse him and rock him to get him back to sleep. But this past week, since he learned to roll from back to tummy, he's been rolling over at night and he seems to prefer to sleep on his stomach. So there are times that he'll fuss a little, roll over onto his tummy, and then fall back asleep. So the past two nights we've gone from 1.5-2 hour intervals to closer to 3 hours, which is much much better. And I'm sure that he'll start sleeping a little longer than that in the next few months (at least I hope so!), so it looks like tummy sleeping seems to be a really big milestone for him.

Speaking of sleeping, he's probably going to wake up from his nap soon so I'd better end this post for now.

Rolling Over and Eating Sweet Potato

Two posts in one day...gasp!

Luke has been rolling over from his stomach to his back for a couple of months now. He doesn't do it a lot but he has done it quite a few times. But he had not yet managed to roll from his back to his stomach. He's been trying and lately trying really hard. Yesterday he managed to get almost all the way over but his arm blocked him. I tried showing him how to move him arm, but he still just wasn't doing it. This is how close he came:

So this morning, I put him on the floor while I was sitting with him and drinking my coffee and what does he do? Rolls over from back to front almost immediately. If I had blinked, I would have missed it! He did it again later in the afternoon and he came super super close to a third time after that.

Today we tried yet another food: sweet potato. This time I think it went much better. He had just woken up from his nap and nursed, so he was in a good mood. And J was home, so he was able to participate and see it, which I was happy to be able to share with him. And I don't think he ate a lot (the serving size for his age is only like a teaspoon so he shouldn't have gotten much anyway, but I don't think he ate even quite that much), but he did eat a few small bites. He did keep it toward the front of his mouth and used his tongue a little to push it but he didn't push it all the way out and he did actually swallow some. (I know he didn't swallow any of the banana before and I doubt very little of the avocado made it into him.) So I have more sweet potato (put some for tomorrow in the fridge and for the rest of the week in the freezer), so I'll keep trying a little of it each day and see what happens.

It might still be a little early to say that we've started solids (today could have been a fluke), but if he does this for a few more days, then I think we'll have officially started solids. Exciting yet also a little scary. It seems easier just to keep nursing him because it's at the point where it's so natural that I barely need to think about it, but I know he'll need to eat something besides breastmilk at some point in the future, so I guess it's good to start slowly now.

A couple of other small things he's doing:

He's trying really really hard to blow raspberries, either sticking his tongue out or just using his lips. J or I will do them at him and he's trying to do them back to us. It's so cute! I got a quick video of him doing it today, but it's not posting here.

He's also gotten a lot more interested in books now and will sit and get through me reading at least halfway through a book before he gets restless. But I can see he's actually looking at the pages now. And he wants to hold the book and even tries to turn the pages. Again, super cute!

 

It's Not a Problem...Until It Is

So I've been a pretty "go-with-the-flow" type of mom: when Luke is hungry, I feed him; when he wants to sleep; I put him down to sleep; when he wants to play; we play. I do very strongly feel that any sort of "schedule" should represent the baby's needs and not something forced by the parent. So although Luke wakes up quite a few times at night, I've just been dealing with it and thinking "that's just the way he is" and "it won't last forever."

When Luke was about three months old, he started sleeping one longer stretch when he first went down for the night (about 5 hours: technically that is almost what is considered sleeping through the night), then he'd have another 2-3 hour stretch and another 1-2 hour stretch. It wasn't too bad at all, especially since he was going to bed about the same time I was so that 5 hour stretch was sleep I was also getting.

I'd heard of the four-month sleep regression and Luke's four month birthday hit while we were in Texas for the holidays. So part of the way through our trip, when Luke started waking up more often at night, I just figured it was this sleep regression combined with our major change in routine.

Now it's almost two months later (Luke will be six months old next week) and it seems like his waking up at night is getting even more often. And it's not just the switch to the crib; he was doing this while he was still in the bassinet in our room. Now a long stretch for him is 2 hours, possibly 2.5 hours. But it's more usual for him to wake every 1.5 hours. He does seem hungry (he nurses right away and I can definitely hear him swallowing), so I always feed him and he goes right back to sleep pretty easily. So although we're up quite a few times at night, it's never for very long (he's always been an efficient eater, finishing in 10 minutes). So although it's not great, it's also not as bad as I'm sure it could be.

I got a taste of that last weekend on Saturday and Sunday evenings. Instead of going right back to sleep after nursing, Luke had a few times where he woke back up almost immediately. At one point, as soon as I would put him back in the crib and crawl back into bed and pull the covers over myself, he would start crying again and I'd have to get back out of bed and rock him. On Monday I could tell that I was feeling the effects of sleep deprivation because my patience was wearing super thin and I found myself getting irritated at the slightest thing (I tried my best to keep from showing this irritation to Luke, but I'm sure he could tell). I went to the mall, thinking that getting out of the house would be good, but that turned out to be a mistake as then I just got irritated with the stroller and the car seat and the pacifier clip and running into racks in Kohl's with the stroller and everything else. So I just went home. Fortunately Luke took a long afternoon nap that day and although there were things I needed to do, I didn't care and I napped with him. I don't think that I actually slept the whole time, but I at least was lying down with my eyes closed and resting. And when Luke and I got up, I felt so much better, so it was definitely a good idea for me to have napped.

Now, Luke did have a stuffy nose (and I know that he's teething, although still no actual sign of a tooth yet), so I'm sure that was what was causing his sleeplessness on those nights. But having this (though not as bad as those two nights) going on for over two months makes me wonder if it's a problem that needs to be solved or if this is truly just the way Luke is and something I just need to deal with. How can I tell? It's not really a problem until it becomes a problem. So has it become a problem?

I started looking at some various sleep books, something I didn't really want to do because I wanted to adapt to Luke rather than force Luke to adapt to some program from a book, especially since all the books seem to just contradict each other. I decided to try Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth because although he does use cry it out as a method, he offers alternatives to that method. (I'm against cry it out for us because first I know that I wouldn't be able to actually do it and second because it goes against my view of the type of parenting I want to follow, which is closer to attachment parenting.)

And I'm only a little over halfway through the book, but now I'm even more confused and worried. Apparently, according to Weissbluth, if I don't help Luke be able to self sooth and fall asleep on his own now, he could develop sleep problems when he is older, even into adulthood; he could also be more prone to issues such as ADHD. And as someone with sleep issues herself, that worries me. I'd love to be like J, who is able to fall asleep less than 5 minutes after his head has hit the pillow. But instead, I find myself unable to get my brain to just stop going around and around with various thoughts and relax into sleep. It usually takes me over an hour to get to sleep each night (although I'm getting better about it these days). I'd rather Luke be able to sleep more like his father than like me. But if his current habits are any indication, it seems that he's going to be sleeping more like me. So because of this book, I'm now starting to get ultra conscious about Luke's sleeping (including his naps) rather than the relaxed state that we had been in. And I do think that something needs to be done to help Luke fall asleep without being rocked and fall back asleep when he wakes up, but I'm not sure how to do it and I'm starting to feel a little stressed about it, which I know probably is not helping at all.

Now I don't expect Luke to sleep straight through the night. I'm breastfeeding and I know that he should have 1-2 wakings at night to be fed. My concern is that it is more like 5-6 feedings. (Although last night he woke only 4 times, so that was actually an improvement.) But is this something that he'll grow out of on his own or is it something that I need to actually do something about to help him? That's the real crux of the problem.

And it's even more confusing after I read an article that one of the moms in my Ravelry forum posted yesterday: Confession: This Pediatrician is a Sleep Softie. Here's a paragraph from this article:

"Our children have always had a reasonable bedtime (even if we ignore it sometimes), we’ve made sure their sleep is safe, and there has never been (or will be) a TV in a bedroom. And now that they are older, everyone sleeps just fine. But when they were little, it never really mattered to us whether they slept independently, or all night. We broke all sorts of 'sleep rules' on a regular basis."

So this mom (who is also a doctor) just attended to her children's needs and didn't worry about any sort of sleep training. And now they are sleeping just fine on their own. So perhaps soothing Luke myself right now instead of helping him learn to self sooth is not so detrimental as Weissbluth's book would have me believe. 

She also writes, "Personally, I think that as a culture we are a bit too hung up on getting our kids scheduled and independent practically from the time they are born." And this is a statement I fully agree with, which has definitely been a key element in my style of parenting.

So whom do I listen to? What do I do with Luke's sleep? Except for those two days last weekend, I've been functioning okay with our current sleep routine (although of course I would welcome more sleep). Should I just keep letting things go on as they have? I have to admit that when I do go get Luke at night to nurse him and rock him back to sleep, he always gets a huge smile on his face when he sees me and that is almost enough to make me okay with missing out on my own sleep. Should I just gauge Luke's mood (which overall is very cheerful) and my own and if Luke seems to be more crabby, work more on sleep and if I seem to be getting crabby, make sure I nap when Luke naps? Or should I work through the non-cry-it-out methods in Weissbluth's book to help Luke be able to sleep more independently? Perhaps a balance between the two?

I'm not sure what direction to go, but as long as we don't have multiple days like last weekend, I'm doing okay. And Luke is happy and cheerful when he is awake so he seems to be doing okay, right? And although I know that I need to make sure I get sleep so I can be a good mom, ultimately, it's Luke that I'm most concerned about. And if his current sleep routine is working for him, then should I really be all that concerned? Is it even a problem at all?

A Night in the Crib

So Luke has his own room (well, half of a room as the other half is my office), but he hasn't really ever used it. The crib is set up, there are decorations on the wall and the shelf, and there's my wonderful glider, but that half of the room gets very little use. Luke takes naps in his swing out in the front room and he sleeps at night in a bassinet beside our bed. It's been working out nicely for us (our bedroom and his room are at opposite ends of the house, so it's much easier to have him right there in the room for nightly feedings than to have to go up and down the hall several times a night).

But Luke is going to outgrow the bassinet soon. And so it seems that it is time to transition him to the crib. And it's not just transitioning him that is the issue; it's also transitioning me. I have to admit that I love having him right beside my bed at night because I can check on him whenever I want (without getting out of bed) to make sure he's still breathing. So moving him to a different room is actually harder on me than him, I think.

So last night was the night. I started by putting him to bed a little earlier than we have been. He's been going to bed around 8:30. Instead of having him take a short evening nap, with a short playtime after, and then bedtime, I just put him to bed when it seemed like he was ready for that evening nap (which turned out to be a little later than he had been taking it, so I think that worked out nicely) around 7:00. I rocked him in the glider, nursed him a little, and put him in the crib. Video monitor in hand, I went back out to the front room to watch some TV and knit and spend time with Jarrett. Luke seemed perfectly content sleeping in the crib. He had a moment around 9:30 (during Grey's Anatomy) where he started wiggling around a lot, but he wasn't crying and he got himself back to sleep.

I decided to sleep on the futon, which is in the room right next to Luke's room so that way if there were any issues, I wouldn't have to keep walking back and forth down the hall. Shortly after I got into bed (10:30), Luke woke up and was hungry so I nursed him. He went right back to sleep and I went back to the futon. Unfortunately, I didn't go right to sleep. And it wasn't the futon. It was my own mind. I keep turning on the video monitor to check on Luke and was straining my ears to hear if he was making any noise. I found myself wide awake. I think I finally got too tired and fell asleep a little over an hour later.

I don't know why I was so worried. Luke didn't seem bothered at all to be in his crib. He had several other wakeups where he wanted to nurse (I think it was 1:30, 3:00, 4:30), but that has been our normal for the past few weeks (he's eating less during the day because he's equating nursing with sleeping and he's been fighting his naps a little, so he's making up for eating at night), so it actually wasn't too bad. He was up and ready for the day a little after 6:00, which is a bit earlier than usual (between 6:30 and 7:00) but not too bad.

So for Luke the first night in the crib was quite a success. And once I actually let myself get to sleep, it was successful for me, too. I'll probably sleep on the futon for a few more nights just to be sure, but I don't want that to become a permanent situation so I'll have to make myself move back to the bed, let's say starting Monday evening. That gives us three more nights to make sure everything is working out okay with the crib.

In other news, the weather was gorgeous again yesterday, so we met up with some other moms and took a nice walk at a part (we also went for a walk the day before). And for the first time, I tried out the stroller without the infant seat so that Luke could actually look around while we were walking. The shoulder straps were a little loose, even on the tightest setting, but otherwise Luke seemed to be perfectly fine sitting that way. (One of the other moms has the same stroller and she said the straps were loose on her daughter for a while, so it seems that it's just the way the stroller is built.) He did start to get a little fussy right at the end of the walk and cried quite a bit in the car on the way home, but he had a very good reason for that as I discovered when we got home: his diaper was quite dirty! Oops on me for not checking it!

One other first yesterday: it was the first time that Luke has actually grabbed my glasses off my face and waved them around. I've tried to keep his hands away from my glasses but I wasn't being careful yesterday morning and sure enough, he grabbed for them. I guess I'll just have to keep a more careful watch, but I'm sure it will happen again.

I think today will be a stay home day since we've been going out a lot this week. If the weather is still beautiful this afternoon, I might go on a short walk around the block, but I think relaxing at home sounds really nice today. And maybe I'll get a little time in for sewing during his afternoon nap, something that I haven't done at all yet this week. We'll see what today brings.

A Bit of Banana

This morning I was making a recipe that called for mashed banana, so I decided to see how Luke reacted to banana. This time I made sure he was in a good mood first.

He didn't like it at all. Just the smell seemed to be rather unappealing to him and he pretty much spit out the banana the three tries that I gave him. I've got it all on the video here. I'll try again with banana when we do start with solids, but so far it's not looking good!

On another note, the recipe I made was for for banana chocolate chip muffins, and I think they turned out pretty darn yummy.